Dear South West London Mum,
“Quite simply the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me. Ever. Ever. Ever.”
Mr NVN decided to repeat himself for extra emphasis.
We were chatting over dinner and if I was to be a dutiful and supportive wife I decided I should know how this compared with his other incidents.
“Worse than when you had to leave that dinner party early for inappropriate comments about the serving dishes?” I asked.
“Irrelevant in comparison,” he replied.
“Worse than when you met my CEO in a Norwich nightclub toilet dressed as a French Maid on your stag weekend, didn’t recognise him and thought he was picking you up?”
“Actually that was pretty bad,” he agreed, “but on balance, worse than that.”
I waited for the explanation.
“So you know I cycle to work?”
This was not news, he now leaves the house every morning packed into his Lycra and wheeling his bike looking like a sea-lion pushing a tricycle in a circus.
“Well at the end of every day, I change back into my cycle gear and its easier if I do that in the meeting room next to my desk.”
“Ok,” so far this didn’t sound too bad.
“I usually just empty my bag on the floor, pick up the bits I need and scoop my work clothes back into the panniers.”
“OK,” I was now getting a bit bored.
“Well yesterday I must have left something behind because this morning there was a company wide email waiting in everyone’s inbox.”
“It read “Could the gentleman who left his XXL pants under the meeting room table please come and claim them from Building Services.””
“Oooh,” I shuddered, “not great but just deny deny deny, how would they know they’re yours?”
“Well,” he continued, “remember when your mother got overzealous with the name-tags and tagged some of my boxers with our sons name?”
I did. Quite how she could confuse the two I don’t know, but it did happen.
“Well a second email turned up ten minutes later.”
“”Building services have found a name tag sewn in the back of the pants. We’ll send them on in the internal mail.””
Here is what you’ve been talking about on NappyValleyNet (Wandsworth):
A number of you feel that Michael Gove sending his children to a “London Super State School” is hypocritical. And some of you don’t…click here for details
My email of a few weeks ago caused one NappyValleyNetter offence, I am more than happy to apologise…click here for details
Back in October one of our users asked if it was possible to job share in an investment bank? She’s posted an update and it transpires she was made redundant a week after her post…click here for details
In a similar vein, Tamara has posted details of a newsstory about working women in other countries. I think “wow” does sum it up, and not in a good way…click here for details
ML is being chased by a debt collector hired by a nanny agency. If Mary Poppins isn’t singing it’s because she’s hired a bailiff…click here for details
“How disruptive is a loft conversion?” asks Petal. Tamara uses a birth analogy, “a bit like Braxton Hicks”, she explains. A basement is likened to early contractions and a side-return? Well you just “don’t want to be there.” …click here for details
Does your little one suffer from night terrors? One NVN’er has a four year old having a really tough time…click here for details
Northcoteluvvie has found a lovely place to eat, but is it so posh only celebs can book, she wonders?…click here for details
Does your family resemble the cast of hit TV series ‘Outnumbered’? Are your kids outspoken, funny and cheeky? Rare Day, a documentary production company, are looking for families to take part in a fascinating film about modern family life. Hmm, beware the final edit is the advice I want to give there!…click here for details
BTC27 would like to know how much do you spend on birthday gifts?…click here for details
BM is moving to Paris. Good idea? Where to live? Which schools to look at?…click here for details
A2005 is thinking of hiring an aupair. Can you offer any advice on responsibilities, roles, hours and pay?…click here for details
SamT wonders if you can recommend good, OFSTED registered, childminders in the Magdalen Estate?…click here for details
“Testing, testing!”. FM needs a PA system to hire or borrow for the 15th of March for a charity quiz night.…click here for details
AgeUKWandsworth is looking for a volunteer telephone befriender – are you a patient and friendly person?…click here for details
AnastasiyaT wants to know if anyone subletting or offering a short let?…click here for details
Esbek is looking for summer youth camps and wants your thoughts on Camp Beaumont…click here for details
Muddlemoo son is too big for a travel cot? Can anybody recommend a solution or a really good bed guard?…click here for details
SamT has dropped an old external hard drive (oops) and its kind off smashed a bit, and needs help recovering the files.…click here for details
SJW is 6 weeks pregnant and so excited about the prospect of having a little one! Can anyone advise her on their experience of requesting a ELCS at Chelsea and Westminster Hospital?…click here for details
Gosia0207 would like to find some playgroups or another nanny in Wimbledon?…click here for details
Lunalu’s daughter is attending Mandarin classes and really loves it. She has convinced them to open a club here in SW11. Nee How!….click here for details
Ynx14 needs a cake maker: her daughter wants a green dinosaur for her 3rd birthday! Are you sure she doesn’t actually want a dinosaur and not a dinosaur shaped cake?…click here for details
Looking for a new challenge? Check out these situations vacant!
Listen up at the back, schools questions are on the playing field in the lovely weather!
The Dulwich Piano Festival is now open for entries! Open to students from any London school (click here) WMS? Overstressed, underweight and self-harming: private schools according to this article? (click here) Lynx has a question about parking for the Finton House drop off (click here) and WandsworthPrep has job opportunities for teachers, TA’s and volunteers!.…click here for details
Mlm is taking advantage of husband’s business trip to Barcelona make a long weekend of it unusually with no kids. yeah! Any child-free recommendations for a hotel.…click here for details
Our House and Garden section is busier than Danny Alexanders PR people
Caroko37 needs a new glass panel with house numbers for her front door. (click here) SM would like a photo wall hanging service. (click here) VH has a neighbour whose loft conversion is causing damp. She’s pregnant, stressed and wonders if she can force him to fix it? (click here) Honeybee needs a good tree surgeon (click here) Sof is Selling a whole load of furniture due to house move (click here) lastly KJBF wonders if Little Greene Paint is worth it or can she colour match and save cash? (click here). Finally NYCmommy is wondering what’s the best way to keep from tracking dirt into the kitchen from the garden…click here for details
Our great friends at MK Kids have written an article on how to design a nursery that lasts. Some top design tips, thanks guys!…click here for details
Our calendar is being upgraded, back later this week bigger and better!
Don’t forget AnnabelsArcade our totally free buying and selling site!
That’s it, have a wonderful week!
Annabel and the NappyValleyNet.com Team